Okay, in the Bible, God tells us to "turn the other cheek." The metaphor that explains how to repress anger and stand up for ourselves and get over it. He also tells us to "forgive those who trespass against us." So I strive hard to let my anger go and forgive the people who have hurt me in some way or another.
But I was talking with a friend who is a very confrontational person. In a situation where I would send a zinger to get back at someone or tell a joke to diffuse the tension... keep my anger and embarrassment to myself... then let it go a day or two later. They prefer to ignore the situation then confront the person head on. They hold grudges for days... for weeks... longer still. And expects an apology or the person to agree with them.
Now I don't know but that doesn't seem healthy to me. They say that sending zingers is sinking to the other persons level, but isn't drudging a conflict up days or even weeks later just as bad?
I would rather let my feelings be known at the time or forever hold my peace. Whereas, they prefer to attack the trespasser and force them to explain themselves (when sometimes said trespasser doesn't even know what they've done!).
So, God, which is worse? Holding a grudge til Kingdom come or zinging someone then getting over it? Either way I try. I vent so I don't explode, but for the most part... I don't let things phase me. And I certainly don't hold someone's behavior over their heads! I try hard to understand them from their perspective, whether I'm right or wrong. And in most cases I get where they're coming from. In the situations I can't (for instance my mother who I will never understand!) I get mad... get physical or emotional or whatever... then get over it!
I LET IT GO!!!
deep breath in with the good
exhale the bad!!
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