Come and Gone

Every week I have a line up of shows to watch on Hulu. It used to be that I would watch these on live TV but then the world was introduced to TiVo. Because my family records shows at the same time as mine (God, forbid!) I have to use an online "TV Station" just to make sure I don't miss any action.

One of these shows is called Eastwick, about three women with witch-like powers who must navigate through some interesting situations. Well, anyway, every time I see the show pop up in my queue I think to myself... nah, I don't want to watch that. So I leave it sitting there so long that I might have two episodes to catch up with before I ever get around to watching the first. I talk myself out of it and think how awful it will be to sit there for an entire hour and watch this rather piece-y show. I never look forward to actually watching it.

Then I get bored. With nothing better to do I resort to watching it... and lo and behold! I actually enjoy it. I get into the characters and the plot and I want to see what happens next.

So why is it that I can't ever remember that I like it so much in the first place? No matter how many times I tell myself I like it, it only seems like I do during the fact and never before or after. The same might be said about my interest in rock climbing. I like the idea of it and have the opportunity to go every single day if I wanted to. Then when I finally make up my mind to do it, I get nervous and try to talk myself out of it. But when I get there I inevitably have fun.

The same goes for meeting up with my friend, I always think of how awkward it can be and I don't want that! But on most occasions we have fun, it's only a select few times that get awkward. So why do I worry that it will be every time?

Dear Lord

Dear Lord:

Thank you so much for all the wonderful gifts you have given me in this life. Although I don't show it as often as I should, I greatly appreciate all that I have... and know that things could become much worse! I also know that I take advantage of many situations and forget to give back. However, that is my hope. My hope is to be able to give back to a wider community. I want so much to be able to see others reap the benefits of the work I do in the future. Whether or not that is a bad thing - yet another situation to be taken advantage of where I gain such palpable rewards - I'm not exactly sure. It's a trade off where both parties win, that is for certain. And how can that be bad? In either case, I pray that you will grant me the opportunity to reach this goal of mine.

As you're aware, I received a notice from a job application with the Smithsonian. Please Lord, let this one be the place I'm meant to get a job. I already know that I don't mind the area, I already know I don't mind the staff (even like the staff in Rusty's department, though I can't say the same of the Anthropology depot.), and from what I've seen on the tour I know that at least one researcher has a sense of humor and the facilities are amazing! I know I could do the work:

Facilitate access to collections and collections records for
repatriation program purposes.
Gather collections data as required for repatriation related
inquiries.
Assist repatriation-related visitors to the collections.
Provide assistance and readily accessible information to
repatriation-related visitors to Museum; and orients them in the use
of the collections and records.

Most of this work is what I have done in my Masters Degree. Archives. Accessibility. Information Technology and Preservation. And what's more, I like this work. Accessibility was one of my more interesting subjects. I like data cataloging and helping people (customer service). I would be good at this job, and for fear of being seen as an idiot and/or being fired, I would be fast at learning the ropes.

It would be a good fit for me and then I could finally move out! I could finally have a life of my own and make money and pay off bills and save up enough to travel and then also get my foot in the door to network and move up or out. Please Lord, what I'm asking is for a chance to have at least an interview, to win over the interviewer, and to get a job!! Help me focus on researching the institution. Help me focus on refreshing my memory of NAGPRA and Accessibility. Help me be professional when I hear back from them, and PLEASE let me hear back from the hiring official.

I know that I don't always deserve what I get but I try to be humble and try to remember to be thankful. Please let me keep both in mind.