It's hard to keep your head above water when it feels like all of your efforts are just dragging you under even more. Like in quicksand, how the harder you struggle to free yourself the further down you're going to sink. Mechanically, that's because the sediments (sand) are saturated with water such that the pressure forcing the sand together and up (friction) is equal to the pressure forcing it down and apart.
Upset this balance (say, with your body) and the greater pressure pushing down will win out. Thrashing around will only disrupt the balance further and you'll probably sink all that much faster. As your feet settle into the muck, the space you've filled forms a vacuum. In order to pull yourself out you need to allow air to fill the void you're feet have created. It is the same with a glass ketchup bottle, the ketchup can't come out until air goes in...
Easily remedied, ketchup bottles work better when you've tipped them on an angle. Same thing needs to happen when you pull yourself out of quicksand - change your angle, allow air to replace your feet, then slowly pull yourself out. Because your body is bouyant, altering your surface area allows you to float on top of the saturated sediment. And with gentle movements across the sand you can effectively get out.
Lately, I've been struggling with life. And I feel like I'm stuck in quicksand. Every time I fill out an application, I get turned down. Every time I make a phone call, I get the answering machine. Every time I work towards something outside my control, it falls through. And I get frustrated and depressed.
Maybe I need to change my angle and stop struggling if this is where I'm meant to be. I don't mean just float along, but, I don't know, get a different perspective.
I know this brother and sister who used to fight constantly. Probably still do. But whenever they would get mad, just as they were about to snap at each other, I'd tell them to say nice things. As if it were a game. I told them that whenever they felt the need to call each other names or swear or whatever... that they should think up some compliment or apology to say instead.
It was hilarious because whenever I stopped the sister from snapping, she'd compliment herself! And whenever I caught the brother from snapping back, he'd apologize that she had some huge flaw that was out of her power to fix. Which would inevitably have them laughing and voila... problem solved.
I feel like I need to do this in the mirror. Whenever I think up some awful thought about myself I need to compliment myself instead. Whenever something happens that is out of my control, I should be thankful of what I have instead of wishing I had more and being depressed about it.
Sure I don't have a job and no body wants to hire me on who-knows-what basis, since they haven't even bothered to get to know me. But that doesn't mean I'm stupid or my life is a failure. I know I'm smart... for one, I give great advice. I pride myself on being observant and seeing all sides of a situation. I am comfortable in my own skin and that right there is a major accomplishment since it's taken me years to get to that point.
For another, I'm safe and live in a loving family (even if they drive me crazy most of the time!). And they hold me to higher standards than I'd ever set for myself... which, while painful, can be a good thing as it forces me to work hard.
I have faith in God and even though I'm currently doubting myself and beliefs, I can see him working through the people around me. Bringing me what I need... not necessarily what I want. And when I ask, I always get an answer. Even if I can't see it right away; when I do see it, it comes together like puzzle pieces - perfectly aligned. Sometimes I just have to remind myself, I'm here for a reason. I'm stuck for a reason. Or rather, I feel stuck for a reason... but in reality I'm not.
And last, when I'm stressed... not just frustrated but truly, tearfully, depressingly stressed (something that I have rarely been before, but am increasingly of late); I can take a deep breath, stretch out, close my eyes for a minute, and find a different angle. Then get back to pulling myself out of the muck.
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